Bittersweet February
“ The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It’s our handle on what we can’t see. The act of faith is what distinguished our ancestors, set them above the crowd.” – Hebrews 11:1-2 Message
February is a month filled with bittersweet celebrations, memories and emotions, at least for me. My birthday is in February and I find great joy in celebrating with those I love and it reminds me of how blessed I am. I also enjoy celebrating Valentines Day with my family and friends. This is an extra special day for my husband to celebrate each other and our love for one another as well. We don’t always celebrate Valentines Day in extravagant ways, but we always enjoy the celebration non the less. These are some of the reasons that create good times and wonderful memories in the month of February and I do look forward to them every year.
February is a winter month that brings bitter cold and for me it also also brings bitter memories from past losses that effect me to this day. I lost my parents in the month of February. First my Father passed a few weeks after my 17 birthday and I remember celebrating that birthday while visiting him in the hospital before he passed. It was less than a year later that my Mother passed and this was just five days before I celebrated my 18 birthday. That birthday I spent grieving the greatest loss of my life. Those birthday celebrations were more bitter than sweet and in fact it did not feel like celebration at all. Looking back I can remember the sadness and pain of those years and the years that followed, without my parents in my life. When I experienced this loss it devastated my heart, shattering it into pieces. It took years for me to find restoration and peace, but I did find that peace, and it was found in Jesus. John 16:33, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
When I saw God’s grace up close and personal, it changed everything for me! Through faith I was given a new life and a new perspective. My view of the world and my place in it was now centered around the one who would never leave me, or forsake me (Deuteronomy 31:8) (Matthew 28:20). I found great comfort in my relationship with Jesus and through it I have grown to understand how God’s love has always been there reaching out for me and looking after me. In Genesis 28:15 say’s, ” 15 I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you.” My greatest fear of being alone was overshadowed by God’s promise and today I live it out freely knowing that He is for me and with me. Through these and many other bitter and sweet memories I can now see how Gods love has always been present. This is living by faith not sight (2 Corinthians 5:7).
All this month I will share Faith experiences from myself and others that testify to God’s love. I have been blessed with what I call a great vision to see through faith, and it is that faith that leads me to live out my days with comfort, peace and joy. I am not alone and neither are you. We have a savior who unites us with God and each other. He loves us and is for us! This is a beautiful truth worth celebrating everyday of our lives!
